I am sitting here at my desk today and my mind keeps drifting to the year ahead. Do you ever find yourself dreaming...drifting...pondering? I've been here in Alabama for over 3 years now and I can't help but feel like I'm in a great need for some change in my life. I don't know what that means and no I'm not planning on leaving my church.
God has given me a personality and mind that dreams and likes to plan ahead but I don't feel very capable of doing that right now in my life. I feel like there's a big nasty ugly hairball clogging the pipe that is progress as of late and I don't know how to remove it.
Who am I becoming? Do I like where I'm at (physically, emotionally, socially, metaphorically)? What are my plans for the future? Where does God fit into all of this? Where should the focus of our student ministry be for the next year (yes, I know... Jesus - but what specifically)?
Talking to my Youth Pastor today (thanks Jeff, you really do need a blog) I came to the very scary realization that I'm actually approaching age 30 (I'm 27 now) and I still feel like a have a world of growing up to do before then. 5 years ago I would not have thought I would be where I'm at today in life. Somehow, I thought I'd be further along. It's hard to explain I guess.
Just some things I'm wondering... hoping for... dreaming for.